I think I became more aware in the bullshit of a new years resolution after facing an impending death, and more medical problems that someone my age should not be facing. After being stood up by my ex boyfriend last year for his seventeen year old lover, yes I said and yes he is eight years older than me I ended up in the hospital for hypothermia, and for my New Years resolution I vowed to take better care of myself and to move on from a broken heart. I sit here a year later and I look back and I said wow, I didn’t change that much.
According to statistics brain.com 62% of Americans made a resolution for New Years 2014, and within that year 39% of New Years Resolutions were fulfilled and more than 70% pretty much said screw it. I sit here and I wonder why do we honestly make these resolutions, if we never follow through with them.
In 2014 I vowed to move on from my broken heart and to make sure I would go to the gym and take better care of myself health wise. In 2014 I have been to the hospital for hypothermia, stress, my heart, post traumatic stress and sleeping problems, a cancer scare, but more recently pneumonia and possible acute hearing loss. I say Mount Sinai Hospital and other hospitals in New York State has had their shared of my pain in the ass. I also had left 2014 with a broken heart from someone that did not care about anything other than himself, and an asshole that wanted to get revenge on my best friend by trying to get with me.
I realized after that it takes more than a New Years resolution for us to get what we really want. In order for us to get what we want out of life we need to really work for it. Reflecting on this last year through all the negatives I see all the positives, I graduated college which made me the first in my family to do that, I started to launch my photography to new heights, I met great people through the ACT foundation and helped put together a great event uniting people of different talents and backgrounds. I went back into nightlife and met such great people that helped me in more ways than one. I started working with Anllelic Lozada and it finally helped me realize what I wanted to do with my life,and on this journey with Anllelic I became friends and made connections with such great people. No matter what bad had happened something good always followed.
I realized I could not let myself become discouraged because of the fails of my New Years resolutions, I have the positive people in my life. The main one being my niece Gianna, my sisters daughter she is my pride and joy. She is the one thing that I fight to be such a positive influence for. I always want to do better because when she gets older I never want her to see me fail her. I want to make her as well as my mom and my sister Briana proud of me.
So this year instead of making my New Years Resolution I am just going to thank everyone despite everything bad I was given a second chance at life. I was given a chance to be with my friends and to have the dignity and grace to let those who were toxic in my life go. I have seen all the negatives and I have been given the chance to turn them into positives. I have been given the strength to move on when I feel like I couldn’t keep going anymore, and to have those friends by my side when life decides to smack me in the face.
I feel like 2014 can be a stepping stone to what 2015 is supposed to be, and with this I am taking 2014 to say goodbye to the New Years Resolutions and to just realize when we close the three hundredth and sixty fifth page of 2014 we can just sit here and ask what is going in the first page of 2015. Despite everything 2014 was one of the best years ever, and I just know 2015 will be twice as good. So everyone instead of making these resolutions just thank those you love for the awesome 2014 and make moves and travel plans to kick ass in 2015.
And so its been said and told Thats all Folks
NYC UNTOLD will be back at full force starting January 6th 2015
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